She Needs To Know

I Need To Tell Her...

I need to tell her. She will find out. Fuck knows what happens when she does. If only she could understand, the ammount of pressure I was under. I wasn't thinking straight. I needed the photo. The people needed the photo, they needed to know the horror of Rwandan Genecide...
Its not my fault, something had to be done about the hell hole that had once been Rwanda. I saw the boy. I saw him look me in the eye, like I was some sort of white god standing in front of him. He saw me take the picture. Set up the picture. He saw me look him in the eye, and walk away. He saw me take his sister, and leave him behind for the Tutsi.

I don't know what came over me. I try to tell myself I didnt see him, I was too scared to. But was I too scared to wait 3 minutes for Alex to wake up and start crying, too scared to wait for her to crawl across a heap of dead bodies, too scared to know that this boy that I left behind could potentially tell the world of what I have done to get this photograph. Too scared. Thats sums me up pretty well now-a-days. Too scared. Too scared to go outside, to stop hiding, to face the music.